This "letters to the Editor"section was inspired by a radio interview recently on Today FM in which a negro taxi driver in Dundalk complained of being by-passed by white passengers(.Legally a passenger can pick out any taxi queuing on a rank.)
Letter from Mrs Bernie Bigot from Foxrock.to the www.taxiregulator.ie re
black taxi drivers (as seen below)
Dear taxi regulator,
I was returning from a holiday in Biarritz late at night, recently, and my husband was unable to collect me at Dublin Airport, as he had crashed the Mercedes in Leeson Street while I was away with my friends. I was forced to seek out the services of-ug- a common taxi, and when I went over to the rank there was a big, menacing looking negro sitting behind the wheel of the first car.I waited a few minutes, hoping he would go away, but to my horror-when he did- the next driver who drove up looked like his twin brother!.
There was a man sitting in a small cabin nearby who appeared to be in charge of the rank.Thankfully he was white-skinned -if somewhat shabbily dressed (no shirt and tie) but I approached him.
" Look my good man,are you in charge here"?
"I am Madam what can I do for you" he politely asked.
"Can you find me a Caucasian taxi drive"? I said.
"Er-whats that misses"?
"Any ordinary bl**dy white, irish taxi driver" I replied getting a little impatient.
"Theres none about at the moment" he said," most of em only work the day shift. The darkies virtually take over at midnight".
"Well, have these people been screened" I asked.
"Oh they have all passed their PSV test" he replied, "Although to be honest from the stories I hear some of them must have got them in a lucky bag".
" I am not asking about them knowing their way to Foxrock,you idiot,I mean have they been tested for AIDS, TB, and Malaria"?
"Oh I see what you mean," he replied "I dont know nuttin about the procedures for getting a permit from Aer Rianta to work at the airport rank, but I know they have to pay 600 euros a year for the permit so they must be financially sound.!"
I am not asking about their social status you fool, I mean have they been examined by a medical practicioner for contageous diseases?"
"Maam, I dont think the Dublin Corporation Authorities who issue their taxi licence-or the Garda Carriage Office who test them for knowledge of the routes an dat, have those facilities.The nearest place where you could get dat dun is probably de London School for Tropical Medicine!"
"Why are there so many negroes driving taxis anyway-there should be a law against it! why do our politicians allow them to overrun the country"
"I dont know nuttin about politics maam, but it gets them off social welfare an rent suppliments, an dat, an saves the goverment a fortune. Its de same in every place now man ,when I was in Oslo last year every taxi driver was a darkie-imagine dat deve even found dere way to de Artic Circle an drive around in de snow.! Funny to see it doug. Me misses said it was like de Black an White Minstrel Show, an you can see de taxi cummin a mile away,dey dont need roof signs, because of the big darkie at de steerin wheel!"
"de irish ones, dey work every hour God gave dem Its a good cash business. Most of dem have a second driver an de car is on de road 24 hours. I hear rumours dat de second drivers are not legitimate or insured because if dey are stopped at a checkpoint an de police check dere photo identity card dey cannot tell its a different driver because dey all look so alike-you know maam, like chinese people wid slit eyes an dat.!"
"Look my good man I have not time to listen to a history of the Irish taxi business, I just want a white man who will drive me home safely,and I am prepared to give him a generous tip as I am getting very cold standing on this wind swept taxi rank".
"In dat case maam,If you are prepared to wait anudder 10 minutes because my shift is just finished , I will be very happy to drive you home to foxrock meself for 50 Euros!".
Letter from Jonah Mogambi irish citizen: profession, taxi driver to the www.taxiregulator.ie & the taxi deregulator Mary Hearney
Dear Taxi regulator, Ger Fanning & Taxi deregulator,Mary Hearney,
My name is Jonah and I am from Nigeria.I came to Ireland 5 years ago with my then 8 months pregnant wife, looking for a better life and to escape the disease ridden slums of Nairobi.We owned a small hotel there at the time and my brother managed it for me when we were seekin asylum. The irish government treated us very well, and so did the refugee agencies and the lawyers, and we cannot thank enough the kind civil servants who found lodgings for us an gave us some pocket money while our application to remain in Ireland was being processed.
4 years after we arrived the government didnt bother processing us any more ,they just said we could stay, as my wife has had two more babies since and our other 6 children have joined us from Nairobi where their Grandma was minding them while we were away an it seems the whole legal situation of deporting us was full of complexity and the lawyers were making a fortune.
Eventually the dole office-as you call them- told us we should look for jobs ,but I know nothing about the construction industry and it seem like very gruelling work for a black boy working on building sites like, the polish workers are better for that kind of thing. I asked if there was a job in security going, like sitting in a hut all night warming me arse in this cold climate which I am unaccustomed to-but other darkies had got all those jobs sewn up,so I went into the taxi business because my cousin who lives in London says theres a fortune to be made driving a taxi and bringing drunks home late at night. He was right. There must be more drunks in Ireland than in London. All the politicians here own the licences to sell alcohol and the people cant get enough of the stuff. I recken some of them are on Cocaine as well. My second cousin Annie tried importing some of the stuff last year but the bas**rds X rayed her insides and arrested her.They even made space for her in Mountjoy prison which is chronically overcrowded since so many Nigerians have started freelancing as drug importers.Gettin back to de taxis,its much safer in dis business.Sometimes they puke it all up again(de alcohol and de Cocaine) but dats one of the hazards of the job. Sometimes the drunks even lose their wallets down the back of the seats or spill money all around the floor of the car for me to pick up when the shift is over.
Well since a nice government lady named Hearney stopped all the taximen from selling their licences for 80,000 euros each and then she started selling them herself (with her other government ministers) for only 5,000 euros each.(She must of taken lessons from Mugabe!) I bought two of de licences with my savings and now I rent one to my cousin from Kinsaha who arrived recently looking for work,and who has no cash or credibility with the Bank of Ireland.(not yet anyhow).
The reason I am writing to you is that I live in a small town called Dundalk, an everybody knows everybody else there, so when I am parked on a taxi rank for an hour they whities who come along often get into the taxis of their other whitie friends and cousins who are behind me in the queue. For some strange reason this is fully lawful, and as a result I am thinking of moving to Dublin as there are no whities left on most of the ranks there now so the people can pick and choose all they like- but they will still end up with a dark boy.!
If the government stop this cherrypicking of taxis by whities and change the law I will be happy to stay in Dundalk because although I could make more money in Dublin I cant afford the rent dere anyhow, so please Mary Hearney (and Ger) you did us all a favour once an I have a little statue of you in my bedroom because now you have a new job and are saving all the sick people from dying in hospitals (Because theres no room there anymore) so I pray every night that you will help us rural negroes who are suffering discrimination in small towns all around the irish countryside.
P.S.I would not be surprised if the Klu Klux Klan sent organizers over from America and infiltrated the Irish Taxi Federation soon.
Your servant and driver, Jonah.